Fast Company and InsideWork’s Dan Wooldridge picked up the same thread a while back and, having recently heard several horror stories about genuinely bad managers throwing good people under the bus, I’m picking it up again. Noting the toxic relationships in many workplaces before the recent troubles, Fast Company cited research suggesting that workers who thought their bosses were unfair might face significantly greater risk of heart disease than their peers in healthier work situations.
This is no laughing matter since heart disease is the leading cause of death in the developed western world and—I was genuinely surprised to learn—has now become the leading killer in India, causing three million fatalities a year (The Lancet, Vol 372 August 16, 2008).
The good news…workers who believe they are treated fairly showed a 30% lower risk of heart disease than those who believe otherwise.
Lesson One: If you’re a boss, then for goodness sake be a decent boss. Be fair. Be kind. Be as tenderhearted as you are tough minded. Don’t make people lose heart. Treat employees the way you want to be treated.
Lesson Two. If your boss is a jerk, find ways to protect your emotional, physical and spiritual well-being. The experts agree: You can’t control your boss but you can learn to control your blood pressure.
If you’re the boss…
- Do you believe your employees think you’re fair?
- Whether you believe they think you’re fair or not, how would you know? How can you find out for sure?
- If you suspect you may be a bad boss, who will help you do better?
- If you find out you really are a bad boss and do nothing, what will it cost you and your company?
If you suspect you report to the boss from hell…
- How can you find out (without a headlong descent into gossip) if you’re right about your boss or if it’s “just you?”
- If it’s not “just you” and if you’re not in a position to fire your boss and find a new one, what can you do to create a happy place where you can go to recover periodically through the day?
- How can you protect yourself from the temptation to slack off or “punish” your boss with poor work?
- Get a confidential partner—someone who will talk straight with you, offer fair critique and sober encouragement; someone who will pray for you and with you.
Whoever you are…
- Take a few minutes to read the FastCompany article and Dan Wooldridge’s Boss from Hell post.
- Take a little time to reflect on, and maybe discuss, the standards outlined in Ephesians 4:29 -32
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
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Comments
I’ve had two really bad bosses over a long career. One was a combination of emotionally dysfunctional and functionally incompetent – but knew how to manage upward. The second was a Dr. Jeykll/Mr. Hyde — nice person on the outside but emotionally crippled on the inside — but knew how to manage upward. Notice the common theme. The damage these two people did was incalcuable to their subordinates and the organization — and yet they survived for years because they knew how to manage upward. That leads to one of three possibilities — the organizations themselves were dysfunctional, the top leaderships were dysfunctional, or both. In both cases, the organizations got to pay for counseling and even physical therapy that people used to deal with the bad bosses.
Glynn, you make a very strong—and very painful—point. My observations here fail to address systemic issues. It seems unlikely to me that very many bosses are bad in isolation. In all but the simplest one-boss/one-employee arrangements, there are witnesses to the bad bossing. Even if these witnesses are not org-chart peers to the one doing the mismanagement, they still have some measure of influence up, down and laterally.
I wonder how many of us look away rather than engaging when we see bad bosses wreaking havoc in our organizations… One way or another, would you agree that’s a tone set at the top?
I have a series of posts on my blog under the category of "It’s Okay to Feel Stupid Sometimes," and it’s unbelievable the amount of traffic I get every day from people doing google searches that say, "My boss makes me feel stupid." Then come the emails and horror stories, people pouring out their hearts to me and asking for advice. It’s sad. There are a huge number of people out there feeling pummelled by their bosses. Whether these people bring it on themselves, is another question, but I believe there is a very needy niche out there of people who need help and support around managing this issue.
As for me, I have mostly worked for decent (not perfect) bosses throughout my career, and am also one myself – decent but not perfect, that is.
Jim, I think the tone is definitely set at the top; it’s also set by the culture and history of the organization. Often we cling to a hope that "if the CEO only knew," then magic would happen and justice prevail. That doesn’t happen very often, for a variety of reasons. But this I know: a bad boss can’t last for an extended period without his or her own boss knowing about it and tacitly approving the behavior.