katkimchee

Every day we ask people, What’s up? Howzit goin? Most just say fine or something equally false. That’s the polite answer, right? We’ve trained each other to understand that we don’t really want to know . . . it’s a formality, nothing more.

I have a friend who, when he asks someone how they’re doing and they give him an automatic fine, replies, “Yeh? Compared to what?” That’s not a bad question if you’re prepared to listen to the answer.

Here’s an email from a friend who gave me a straight answer.

I am coming to grips with the harsh realities of working for a public company. I see the dreams of being part of a great company filled with great people fading into the heartless pursuit of shareholder favor for the sake of a small handful who hold significant numbers of shares. I hate it.

Each day it seems more difficult to put on the right persona to lead a group of people in a quest I no longer believe in. I feel trapped by the needs of my family. I even find myself resenting having so many people dependent on me. My head knows that ultimately they are not truly dependent on me but that theology has failed to carry most days.

I know all the stuff about being grateful for what I have and being content in all situations but I’m neither grateful nor content. I know about networking and the other elements of looking for something else to do. I don’t want something else to do. I want something to be excited about, to believe in and to enjoy. After the last two years I’m not sure I know what those things are. I have such a bad taste in my mouth that everything sounds okay at best and just as bad at worst. I find no joy in work. I find this quite ironic since we are currently studying Module 5 on the meaning of work.

I have even found myself daydreaming about running away or about what my life would be like right now if I didn’t have so many people needing so much from me. These daydreams are usually directly followed by an acute sense of shame that shrouds my heart.

That’s tough to read from a friend. But, as tough as that is, I happen to know this guy is one of the lucky ones. He’s surrounded by friends who want a real answer when they ask how it’s going. Even then, there are days when he dreams about running away. But he hasn’t, at least not yet. The Module 5 in his email is Module 5: The Meaning of Work from InsideWork’s Scriptural Roots of Commerce. The SRC is a group learning experience through which a few friends make a commitment to help each other recapture the holy nature of working in a unholy world. I don’t know anyone who can’t benefit from that kind of group. After all, no one should have to lie when they answer the question, “How’s it going?”